Change is inevitable, but how we react to that change impacts our quality of life. The invisibly disabled respond to changes in a variety of ways -- some good, some not so good.
THEN
At age 31, I was a happily married mother of two young sons. My husband was a graduate student. I worked at a job I enjoyed. We had a rosy future ahead of us. Several days in a row, I pushed myself at my job when I was tired, ending up with a very severe, disabling back injury. Oh no! But it would heal, and I would be fine. Right? Wrong!
NOW
Almost 40 years of invisible disabilities later, I’m still very limited. My story is all over this website, but the point is: my life changed
dramatically that week.
If you follow this blog, you’ll see how I have responded. But, have you thought about your own past reactions? Have you planned how you might respond to future changes?
Thinking through possible scenarios of change and response helps us act pro-actively rather than reactively. If you’re a dweller, you can be certain change is in your future. Be prepared for more storms while continuing to hope for good changes. Decide in advance how you will respond to possible changes.
Possible good changes
- Improvement in symptoms.
- New friends.
- Getting married.
- Birth of a child or grandchild.
Possible unpleasant changes
- New, or worsening, symptoms.
- More diagnoses.
- Change in relationships, especially if due to our physical problems.
- Loss of employment.
Be prepared for a changed new life
The 4 Rs: Choices of how to react to change
Reject the storm
- "It isn’t really happening."
- If I tell myself that enough times, it will go away.
Resist the changes
- "I’m just not going to let them change my life."
- So, I’ll just keep on doing what I’m doing, even if it isn’t working.
Resent what’s happening
- "It’s not fair."
- Therefore, I’ll become bitter.
Re-frame the question
- Understand and research the problem.
- Consider possibilities.
- Re-evaluate your life’s purpose.
- Change what’s needed.
- Accept what is; let go of what can no longer be.
For myself, I find answers in God.
Isaiah 43:1-2 contains reassurances. If we belong to God, He tells us:
- Relax in His care because we belong to Him.
- Recognize His presence with us as we pass through waters and rivers.
- Rely on God’s protection as He preserves us through fiery trials.
What about you?
How do you respond?
How will you respond in the future?
