Do you see the woman in the grocery aisle? The one in the way because she’s moving so slowly! Do you notice the cousin sitting at his family reunion? He’s always sitting down! Are you aware of a coworker who takes for—-ev—-er to finish her work? Is she lazy! Maybe they are just lazy or uncaring, but just maybe these people have physical reasons for their actions. Reasons others can’t see. And sometimes, these hurting people themselves aren’t seen.
Have you watched the “See Me” ad by Cosentyx on TV? The first part of this ad jumped out at me. “See me!” Thus plaintively cry out seven individuals doing various activities. These people can obviously physically be seen. But they feel unnoticed.
Invisibly disabled people often feel unseen. Because we frequently can’t fully or easily participate in life, we feel invisible to our friends and family. It seems like they forget us. When they do see us, we sometimes sense they don’t truly believe our problems are genuine. Our feelings may not be true, but they are real.
See me! Really notice me. Please!
So … are you truly seeing me?
The master Care-er and a great role model, Jesus, never overlooked people. Neither did He misunderstand them. Let us learn much from Him.
Groothuis* observes, “Jesus had a way of seeing what others missed and ministering to those who were forgotten, shunned, or misunderstood. He touched and healed lepers when everyone else scurried away. He cared for those with chronic afflictions – such as congenital blindness and incurable hemorrhage – while others gave up on them. He bestowed hope where others scattered the ashes of despair. He was love Incarnate (John 1:14; 1 John 4:16). We need that character of divine love if we’re to see and minister to the hurts of others.”
Some do’s and dont’s in recognizing invisibly disabled people:
- DON’T interrogate her about her health.
- If you know the other person well, ask things like, “How are you feeling today?” Cautiously inquire, if appropriate, “What can I do to help?”
- DO observe.
- Is he like this all the time? Do you know of other issues in her life: is she tired from working two jobs or having a new baby at home?
- DO listen when he talks, especially if he talks about his limitations.
- DON’T offer unsolicited advice, particularly medical advice (unless you’re a doctor and are familiar with the condition).
- DO accept what she says without judgment.
- DO inform yourself about your friend’s condition.
Above all, treat us as regular, normal people. Because we are, with needs similar to yours.
Really see us.
Be a friend.
Offer compassionate help when appropriate.
Like Jesus, be accepting and caring.
