Listening Lightens Our Load – Can You Help?

Are you listening?

Can you hear me?

Do you even know I exist?

Questions too many people ask in their stormy times. Let’s deal with one aspect of listening and caring: discovering the storm stories of physically challenged people. It only takes some time and compassion, but listening to invisibly disabled friends can make a BIG difference in their lives.

Elise shares her views about the subject.

An Eye-Opening Experience by Elise Switzer

In “We Move News”

“It is about listening to people’s story and sharing that burden with them for just a moment to lighten their load. Each person simply wants to know that she or he is not alone, that there is someone out there who understands exactly what he or she is going through.

“Listening to people’s stories thus sharing that burden with them for a moment to lighten their loads. Each of us just wants to know that we are not alone, that there is a real person out there who understands what we are going through.

“When you listen to our stories, you are sharing our burden with us for a moment which lightens our load. We just need to know that we are not alone, that there is a real person somewhere who cares enough to listen.”

You may care deeply for your friend, but he may not realize it if you don’t communicate your interest in him. One way, as Elise says, is to listen to his story.

If you haven’t already heard your friend’s story, please seriously consider planning a time to do so. Be aware, though, that her story may not be pretty. It may not be believable to you. But listen with a loving heart, and you’ll both be blessed.

Listening to Invisibly Disabled People: Reasons, Plans, and Practices

3 Reasons to Listen

1. Listening acknowledges we exist — that we have worth, regardless of our circumstances.
2. It conveys that you care about us.
3. Listening tells us we are not alone.

3 Approaches to Consider When Planning to Listen

1. Make a special time with your friend, or visit at her house, or invite him out for coffee.
2. Keep the time private; don’t gossip later about what you hear.
3. Provide a relaxed atmosphere, so you’re both comfortable.

3 Good Practices While You Listen

1. Put aside your own agenda.
2. Focus on us.
3. Don’t stop listening even if our stories get ugly.

3 Caveats

1. Everyone’s personality is different, so keep in mind some people do not feel better for sharing.
2. Pay attention to specific circumstances. Maybe the time’s not right, or maybe they’ve had a bad day and are too fragile to open up.
3. If you don’t know us well, it’s likely better not to ask deeply personal questions. Get better acquainted first — another good way to demonstrate care.

Paul tells us in Romans 15:1, “Now we who are strong ought to bear the weaknesses of those without strength and not just please ourselves.” Good advice. That’s what you do when you acknowledge our existence and our realities by listening to us.

Please leave a comment and share about how you listen to a friend. Or, tell us how someone listening to you helped.