The short answer is no. We know that anger and chronic illness often coexist. Dwellers challenges frequently overwhelm them. Frustration results.
How can these upsets be managed?
My friend Dena reaches a point where she realizes she cannot take one more thing; now how can she do her work? Then one more thing happens, but she asserts God’s grace gets her through. Life is not what she imagined; her plans remain unachieved. Countless days are just too much: she cannot grocery shop, cook meals, take trips, or even walk across the street. Few days are satisfactory. She cannot remember “normal” anymore.
Too many of us dwellers can relate to Dena.
Frustration and anger, however, can be dealt with in a positive manner.
Dena’s concerns resonate with me. They are so familiar. Overwhelmed emotions lead to frustration, which results in unpleasant reactions. In my case, I get peevish. Too often, Joe is the recipient, requiring him to exercise extra restraint in order not to react. It is unfair for me to boil over at him when he was not even aware of the reasons.
Unresolved frustrations lead to anger. But anger can result in fear, worry, and depression. Any of these can contribute to frustration. Now, an unpleasant cycle results. It becomes imperative to break that cycle.
What events annoy me? Most likely, the causes for your frustration differ significantly from mine. Listing yours is a starting place in managing anger.
My frustrations
- Interruptions to my plans.
- Poor time choices that necessitate rest when I should be up.
- Loss of a complete day to unforeseen flareups.
- One problem gets better, but another gets worse.
- When standing up from my recliner takes several tries.
- The need to adapt as conditions change.
- Inability to make concrete plans for myself or others.
- The trade-off of a shopping trip or doing necessary tasks.
A few ways to overcome anger
- Manage other emotions.
- Research.
- Read reputable books.
- Search dependable websites.
- Reach out to others.
- Seek trustworthy friends.
- Attend reliable church
- Professional help.
- See your medical professional.
- Seek a counselor.
Some closing thoughts
I am not a trained counselor nor medical professional. But you can contact me, and I can try to point you in the right direction of someone who can help.
If your anger is such that you have thoughts of suicide, please check this Suicide Prevention page for more help.
Circling back to our title: No, we do not have a right to be angry because life has not turned out the way we expected. But there are ways to manage anger and chronic illness. We can enjoy life again!
In those inevitable times of frustration and anger, what do you do to help alleviate those emotions?
Investigate Further
For a different viewpoint, see “It’s OK to feel angry.”
Tom Seaman presents more helps for managing anger.
See our page Storm Dwellers < Emotional Help for helps concerning other emotions.
Includes excerpts from our book, Sunbreaks in Unending Storms, ©2021.
