Caregivers are human, too. They get sick. They get overwhelmed. Sometimes, they even need surgery. So … What do you do when that happens? You still have needs to be met, but now they might not be able to aid you as normal. And now, they may be unable to meet their own needs.
Joe, my husband, best friend, and caregiver on our 50th
Between 2012 and 2015, Joe had five surgeries. Each of these incapacitated him for several weeks to several months. And now, he has some as-yet-unidentified problem which is slowing him down; he can take care of himself but is unable to help me as much. Our closest family is 45 minutes away and unable to help much. We do have friends at church who help when we ask. But, caregiver-care remains a problem.
During these times, our needs included transportation: getting Joe to the hospital, taking me to visit him some, buying groceries, and getting to doctor appointments. I needed a woman who could come over morning and night to take care of my TENS electrodes. Friends provided meals. For the most serious surgery follow-up, we received home health care. One time, a volunteer came each week for six weeks to do the housework Joe usually does. Each situation was different, requiring differing helps.
Some needs could not be met: who could be around 24/7 to do the “small” things he normally does for me. Taking up that slack plus fetching for him put a strain on my body, increasing fatigue and weakness.
Add to that, the danger of his falling: what could I do if he did?
Each of our situations are different. Do you have a paid caregiver? If so, you can likely find a substitute. Is your caregiver a family member? Are there others who can help? What is his/her health like? How serious are your needs? Do you need trained help, or can a caring volunteer do it? What kinds of needs will/does the caregiver have?
So, if you haven’t thought about these things, now’s the time to start. Every caregiver at some point will likely be able to give care.
Steps to planning
Evaluate
- Think about your current situation.
- What needs do you have?
- Can a compassionate friend or family member meet that need, or would you need professional help?
- What needs might your caregiver have?
- Are you able to help at all?
Investigate
- Look for sources of help.
- Family
- Friends
- Church members
- Government programs
- Hired help
Make the plan
- Write it down.
- In case of an emergency when your mind is full, you won’t have to be figuring out what to do. You can just proceed according to plan.
Once your plan is devised, you can forget about what might happen and get on with enjoying the life you have now.
In conclusion
So, have you considered what might happen if your caregiver needs care? Have you made contingency plans? If not, I urge you to do so soon. After all, we are all human—including our caregivers—and that means sicknesses and surgeries can happen.
Of course, you can’t foresee every possibility. Just do the best you can, and don’t worry. God has your back. Just plan it, and forget it.
